In public, our children are angels. At home… Let’s suffice to say that I have threatened to sell them to the zoo or circus more than once. I often question whether Lira’s behavior is just typical for an Autistic child and if the boys are mimicking her. Regardless, some things cannot be tolerated… like complete disrespect. Yelling at me, “You’re not my Mommy. Get out of this house!” Slamming doors so hard they break.
We started seeing a therapist to see if this was strictly an Autism thing or there was more to it. At the same time, I started researching discipline techniques for special needs children and talked to me friends about how they discipline. Bill and I read Have a New Kid by Friday: How to Change Your Child’s Attitude, Behavior & Character in 5 Days. I also looked over the Discipline Chart by Confessions of a Homeschooler.
Together with Bill and all this information, we sat down and came up with Our Family Rules. Using this with a ABA (Applied Behavior Analysis), we are starting to see changes.
How Our Family Rules Work
- Bill and I had to agree to be a team to make this happen. We prayed a lot about the behavior of our children and made this chart together.
- We had a family meeting with the children together and explained why the rules were important and explained each rule, Scripture and discipline.
- When the children disobey, we remind them of the Scripture and pray with them after they are disciplined.
- We are consistent in following this chart.
So, if you are feeling like I was… without hope, totally stressed and worn out mentally and physically… maybe this can help you too.
To download the chart, CLICK HERE.
NOTE: Bill and I agree that spanking is necessary in instances of defiance and disrespect. When we spank our children, it is painful for us. We remain very calm, take the child to their room and ask them to lay across our lap. If the child lays across our lap without much fight, they get one moderate spank with a wooden spoon across the cushy part of their behind. If they resist, we tell them they will receive two spanks and typically, they give in and lay across our laps. Afterwards, we ask them to stay in their rooms until they can calm down. Once they are calm, we give hugs and kisses, express our love and pray together.
More on the ABA tomorrow!
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